**Signs of Our Times... **
*Veterinarian's Office sign:
"All unattended children will be given a free kitten"
*Plumber's Shop:
"We repair what your husband fixed."
*Pizza Shop slogan:
"7 days without pizza makes one weak."
*At a tire shop in Milwaukee:
"Invite us to your next blowout."
*Door of a Plastic Surgeon's Office:
"Let us help pick your nose."
*Sign at the Psychic's Hotline:
"Don't call us, we'll call you."
*At a Towing Company:
"We don't charge an arm and a leg. We want tows."
*Billboard on the side of the road:
"Keep your eyes on the road and stop reading these signs."
*On an Electrician's Business:
"Let us remove your shorts."
*In a Veterinarian's Office:
"Be back in 5 minutes, Sit! Stay!"
*In a Nonsmoking Area:
"If we see smoking we will assume you are on fire and take appropriate action."
*On Maternity Room Door:
"Push, Push, Push."
*At an Optometrist's Office:
"If you don't see what your looking for you've come to the right
place."
* On a Taxidermist's window:
"We really know our stuff."
* In a Podiatrist's Office:
"Time wounds all heels."
* On a fence:
"Salesmen Welcome: Dog food is expensive."
* Outside a Muffler Shop:
"No appointment necessary, we'll hear you coming."
* Inside a Bowling Alley:
"Please be quiet, we need to hear a pin drop."
* In the front yard of a Funeral Home:
"Drive carefully, we'll wait."
* In a Counselor's Office:
"Growing old is mandatory, growing wise is optional.
* Lot outside Veterinarian's Office:
"Parking for Customers Only, all others will be Neutered.
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